Black Friday

This summer I had myself a picnic in Central Park. It was unseasonably cool, and the park was inviting. I'm not saying the park invited me because the park doesn't send out invitations using Evite or even paper invitations, which I think are a lost art and if I ever have kids, I will send out birthday party invitations in the shape of Kermit of the Frog and I will bake cupcakes from scratch even though the kid wants a Carvel Fudgie the Whale (who by the way has a Myspace page if you want your brain to explode). So I took the purple plaid sheet that's become my picnic sheet because it doesn't fit my bed and also because I accidentally stole it from an apartment I sublet. But here's the thing. What I'm trying to say, that is. That it wasn't really summer when I had this picnic. It was what's known as Black Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, when a ton of people start their Christmas shopping. And when I say picnic, I kinda mean went on a trip to Walmart. As in there wasn't any food or picnic blankets or parks involved. There was only a Walmart on Long Island. I think next year I'm just gonna have some egg salad on a bagel. Because it tastes good and it's not as dangerous, unless you get the egg salad with the salmonella, but if you do that's just bad luck.